I Will Be Back
Sofia, a former missionary in Senegal, visited the Brooklyn community for New Year’s, as she has for the past several years.
Then the LORD said: Go out and stand on the mountain before the LORD; the LORD will pass by. There was a strong and violent wind rending the mountains and crushing rocks before the LORD—but the LORD was not in the wind; after the wind, an earthquake—but the LORD was not in the earthquake; after the earthquake, fire—but the LORD was not in the fire; after the fire, a light silent sound. When he heard this, Elijah hid his face in his cloak… (1 Kings 19:11-13)
Spending New Year’s Eve with Con-solatio for the past two years feels like Elijah’s experience of searching for and encountering God. The community’s Yule Tide tradition is to spend the hour leading up to midnight in adoration at St. Nicholas parish. Aside from us, the immense church is empty, and all lights are off except those shining on the Blessed Sacrament. We know it is five minutes before midnight, because of sounds of fireworks and shouts that progressively multiply until 12:00am. Fireworks, shouting… wind, earthquakes, fire… yet the Lord sits silently before us, whispering that He is there and that He reigns on this New Year, just like He has on all the ones that came before it.
When I got back from mission after 2 years in Senegal and 3 months in Italy, I realized that I did not want the same things that I had wanted before. I still followed my plan and pursued a Master of Global affairs at the University of Notre Dame, but my gaze had changed. My deep recognition of the goodness of true friendship and belonging became the lens through which I now viewed life. I made a commitment to come back to Con-solatio in New York, at least once a year, in order to remember what I experienced a few years ago on mission and to keep friendships alive that gave me new life. I chose to live in community because I valued how it challenged me and brought out the best in me. In my classes about international development, I shared the importance of bringing a human presence to those who suffer, aside from catering to their material needs.
As I graduate in May and am currently job-searching, the year ahead is a mystery. But He reigns! And I know I will be back in Brooklyn in December.